Real Women Don’t Buy Guacamole!

Posted by on 04.21.10 | 3 Comments
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I can’t help but think fondly of those two books that came out – in what, the early 80s, maybe? – One was called “Real Women Don’t Pump Gas” and the other “Real Men Don’t Eat Quiche”.  As a junior high school student looking for clues on what real women do, I devoured them but, alas, now I don’t remember a thing from them so I’m having to make my own rules up as I go.

As a foodie who has just started to blossom, the first “rule” that came to mind is “real women don’t buy guacamole” (from a grocery store in a plastic tub, at least).   I mean, the store bought version is full of chemicals (in the plastic tub and guac, itself – really, how do they get it to stay such a pretty color?) and devoid of life.  The home-made type takes about a minute to make, will keep for two days, tastes head-and-shoulders above the store bought variety AND, best of all, is really and truly GOOD FOR ME.

Another rule:  “real women don’t eat meat breakfast, lunch and dinner” primarily because we’re smarter than to buy the hype about “getting enough protein”.  I think, in this day of animal production that is horrific to the animals and the planet, real women are coming to see meat as a condiment and as completely optional.   I so encourage everyone to go off meat completely for a couple of weeks to see how they feel.  I felt a huge difference after just three nights without it.  How will you know how much meat is right for you unless you experiment with how much of it you eat?

My third rule:  “real women like real flavors and food they can identify”.  Screw flavor enhancers, preservatives, pesticides, genetically modified food, and things on a label I can’t pronounce.   Though I haven’t given up my organic tortilla chips from Costco, I have “given up” 90% of the processed foods in my life and can now make home-made hummus from raw beans in less than 30 minutes – start-to-finish. 

Snapshots of some of my other “rules”:

Real women take grocery and produce bags with them….In recycling, supply far exceeds demand – enough said.

Real women grow food….Even if it is just a little oregano in the window-sill, there’s a piece about being connected with what nourishes us when we grow part of it ourselves.

Real women compost….Even in an apartment, there’s the option of a bin of “red wigglers” and for those living in a house with a little yard, composting can be done in a couple of kitchen garbage cans.  It’s crazy to call something trash and make it part of the problem when it is actually the source of life. 

Real women eat more than just wheat, rice, corn and soy….In “Defense of Food”, the author puts-out that 75% of the American diet comes from those four foods” (and that most people don’t even think they eat that much of them but those are the foods that make up most of what’s in processed foods).  When was the last time you bought a tomatillo, spelt flour, quinoa or cabbage?

I offer these rules as a “taking stock”  for myself of where my experimentation with food has gotten me.  What do I truly believe about food?  What to I practice?  A good piece of it is now wrapped up nice and pretty in the “real women rules”.  Six months ago, none of this would have made any sense to me. I believed the idea of “change your diet, change your life” was hooey.  Today, I live “by the rules” easily because they’ve improved the quality of my experiences enormously.    




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