Guest post: Love can make us change

Posted by on 09.11.08 | 1 Comment
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This is a guest post from Tania Crawford about a response to a previous post on the Virtual Tea House: My Best Day so far: Absolutely Nothing Happened. Hope you enjoy Tania’s process with these concepts! Our prayers today are with Tania and Mackey…

To Change A Mind, Heart and, Hopefully, the Course of A Life

Hyacinth Macaw--Tennessee Aquarium by Momba

flickr photo by Momba

This post is a direct result of Beth’s journal about a day that seemed ordinary on the outside and was anything but on the inside. This post, which I read yesterday, had profound impact on me today. Spirit brought it to me at the just the right time and in just the right way and my gratitude to Beth for being the conduit.

If you haven’t read her post, I so encourage you to do so. My writing assumes you have and is based on my interpretation and remembrance of it — accurate or not.

I have another post that I may publish tonight or may not. The post will be title “A huge love for a little bird” and is all about my enormous respect for my Macaw, Mackey, and what she and I have been through together over the past 18 years. I think I’ll post it under stories of inspiration for that is what she is to me. We’ll see.

All I need to say here is that for the last four or so days, I have been completely afraid Miss Mack (as I call her) was dying from a fungal infection in her respiratory system. If you know anything about fungi, you know they are incurable and that the medicine used to treat them kills healthy cells. Nasty stuff. Parasites. In the lungs, the fungi feed off the lung cells and the host dies of suffocation.

Mackey’s complete story will be in this other post…I promise. The bottom line, is that we’ve been “dancing” (I’m trying not to use negative words here) with this thing for 3 months now. All the vet. told me was that she had a “yeast” infection and to treat it with nystatin for 3 weeks. That was mid-July. That was after she had been diagnosed with a bacterial infection in the lungs in May, on antibiotics for 2 weeks and after the same vet. told me that probiotics weren’t necessary.

So I followed the vet’s advice and sure enough the butter-colored spores that were visible in the back of her throat had disappeared after the prescribed three weeks on nystatin. I breathed a huge sigh of relief until four days later, she was sick again. No spores so we assumed bacterial infection again. Another ten days on antibiotics. She was okay for about three days when the wheezing started again. The vet said more nystatin.

At this point, I’m thinking, “My Baby is dying and all the vet can do is throw meds at her…obviously there’s a relationship here that I don’t get”. I called the vet’s office and had a tech. give me the name of “yeast”. Turns out, it wasn’t a yeast at all but a fungus called “rhizopus” which is commonly known as “Black Bread Mold”.

Turns out, it’s the same one that ruined the health of two very good human friends. Turns out, there’s no known cure and that all the medicines do is make it harder for the host’s own defenses to get rid of it. Turns out, those with healthy immune systems can fight it pretty good on their own but if one is comprised, like after a organ transplant, or elderly or fighting pneumonia, it can get a hold and kill. During my research into this during the last week, I had one scientist tell me the most humane thing I could do would be “to put her down”.

My vet had no clue about any of this. Gave me no indication in July that I was dealing with something potentially fatal. Didn’t tell me about “secondary infections”. After about 14 hours on the internet, calling OSU, speaking with biologists, chemists, pathologists, breeders of fancy chickens, other veterinarians and human doctors, I can say that I’ve just about become a expert of Rhizopus and, after all that, I had no more hope, no more leads on what to do for her, than I did when I started.

On Monday, I found a obscure web-site of a lady that breeds chickens explaining clearly and accurately about respiratory fungal infections in chickens and ducks. She mentioned a product that saved some of her birds from dying that her vet had recommended. I immediately searched for the product, found it on Amazon and read five amazing testimonials about how it really and truly kills fungus. I ordered immediately thinking it would arrive in three or four days and we’d be fine.

The next night (last night), however, Mackey seemed so sick and I panicked thinking she wouldn’t make it till morning. I knew nothing else to do except for this stuff I had just discovered and was desperate to get it NOW — not in four days — so I got back on line and in attempt to find it in Bend. There was no hide nor hair of it on the West Coast.

This is where Beth’s journal entry comes in. She talked about fairly adverse circumstances for any traveler and how many wonderful people who came forward to help her in her time of need. We’ll, I’ve been so stressed and distressed that I’ve mostly encountered others hassling — not helping me — lately. So, last night, knowing that if I was to get her on this product tomorrow (today), it was going to take extra help from others, I 100% made my mind up that the people I would encounter would want to help – Just like the people Beth mentioned in her blog.

Here it is — 24 hours almost to the minute after that decision — and Miss Mackey is inhaling the disinfectant. Sure enough, everyone I dealt with from the two receptionists, to the parts guy at Cascade Heating (where I ended up getting it at and whom spent his break and his lunch hour trying to find it for me) to the chemical engineer at a multi-million dollar manufacture in Oklahoma who couldn’t stop thinking about Mackey and brought her to a staff meeting to try to figure out the proper dosage and administration of it went completely out of their way to help her.

I just know that if I had gone into this day with the attitude that this was going to be a hassle, etc., etc., it would have been. Beth’s journal entry was somewhat of an epiphany to me last night (nothing I didn’t know, mind you, but skills I certainly needed reminding of). Thank you, Beth…the people my renewed attitude brought to me today were the absolute best. Thanks to you – and them – I am knowing that Mackey is vitality, health, life and maybe, just maybe, we’ll both be able to get some sleep tonight.

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